To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.~ Mother Teresa
Where for good or whether it is to feel demoralized, what you put in is what you get out. So be mindful of your words. You may think you not, but be in a quiet place) incidentally you only have to answer to you, no one else will know), and really pay attention to the words you think as well as the one you speak.
If you put martyrdom, victimization, helplessness or hopelessness in your words, you will also eventually show it in deed. Happily the reverse is also true.
No, today you may not be able to move a mountain, but you surely can move a pebble. If you are not able to even do that, you can move (change) a thought.
And replenish it continually just like fuel. In time it becomes second nature.
What you give attention to is what you give it power. So do you want to be power-full or power-less? Like it or not it is up to you.
We all will have a bad day or two or the “no body loves me but my mama, but she may be jivin' too” (as the blues song goes) but if it’s consistent and persistent, then it is no longer a bad day. It is treading dangerously into a unbroken pattern.
I am not that much different in having a funky day or a funky week, but honestly after awhile singing the blues has gone on for so long will wear you out as it will anyone else within distance of you.
So unless you are playing a CD or off to the juke joint for a catharsis, turn it off! For when it is your signature it is ungainly & when your friends, (or the lack of them, which indicates something) have to take a shot of booze before they can come around you should tell you to start paying attention to yourself.
Put on Big Mama Thornton or Muddy Waters or BB King but remember even they at some point put the guitar away and go out & have big fun. They know when the lights go down & they go to town, the curtain lowered they have a life outside of the blues.
There are some things that demand immediacy & relief and we may not be able to get that just yet. And it would be foolish & naïve to think that just having happy thoughts will eradicate the hunger or the suffering. But if bad thoughts or unhappy ones can make one feel badly (and by the way it is catching), then wouldn't good thoughts positve mindfulness can lift the heart & spirit too? And that too is contagious
My thoughts here are not to be confused with clinical depression but of one where people whose very words are always laced with a veneer of sadness and pity for themselves makes you gasp for air. There is a veneer of control involved in that especially when any assistance is met with resistance, all the time.
You ache for them, but at the same time you want to run because the sadness can be contagious and before long others will feel sad too, though before hand they were in a pretty good state. Be mindful that lacing the sadness with humor is still old sweetened sadness. True enough there is a whole lot of in the world to give us angst & sorrow with too much to spare, so why make a default contribution?
Whether it is fair or not, in time people will distance themselves from you, me, whomever if they perceive you with the constant cloud over you as the character in the old Lil Abner cartoon use to have with trouble doom and despair everywhere he went. It is human nature to have balance to have laughter to offset the tears, to have peace to offset the pain, to have rain to offset the heat. So it shall be for you too.
So what is the alternative?
Pile up with goodness in yourself. The goodness maybe that you will change your M.O. and that is goodness in itself. The fact you are still here despite it all is huge. Some are not that fortunate to have that much at there disposal. Truly we are not an island all to ourselves though we may think it when there is despair, but also be mindful that at the close of the day, when you look in the mirror yours is the only face that will reflect back.
Treat yourself with the same loving kindness that you believe or want to believe you give to others. Be vigorous about imbuing yourself with goodness. There is something/ somewhere/ somehow that is good, otherwise we would have all keel over long time ago. Put oil in that lamp so it can to shed light despite the sorrow. But keep it full, replenish it frequently and see if you heart will be lighter & brighter. Step outside yourself and do something for someone else and see if it lifts the load for a moment.
And while you’re doing something for another, break off a piece for yourself and see how good goodness can be.
Now how cool is that?
All rights reservedJHM 6-28-08©