Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Oh Grow Up!

The greatest day in your life and mine is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly grow up.~John Maxwell

Some days I feel more grown up then others...

There are those days when I take myself too seriously and it can be taxing and wearing and I have to lighten up a bit... 

"People suffer because they are caught in their views. As soon as we release those views, we are free and we don't suffer anymore." ~Author Unknown

I like to think that I won't lose the wonder-sense of a child, yet develop and maintain the wisdom that comes with maturity.  I am just enough of an optimist that one can have both; that they can live comfortably and interchangeably in me (and you).

Having that wonderment is not being immature.  Having life leaping out from you, exploring old things with fresher eyes, fresh things with an old soul, having a soulful, cocky, peppy step doesn't have a timeline unless you are 6 feet under, having an attitude of I'm good or It's good is indeed viable.

And contagious...

It is possible to live happily in the here and now. So many conditions of happiness are available—more than enough for you to be happy right now. You don't have to run into the future in order to get more, no matter how sorrowful the world is that day, no matter how sorrowed we may feel from what we think are lost times, denied times or abandoned dreams.

Trust me I know about that, still have some of those times even now, but doggone it despite, it all I still see goodness in sometimes the most inopportune event.

We can’t all be stars but we can all twinkle at given moment.

So here is my twinkle...

Yesterday, I went to see someone I had only met very briefly who was actually begging for money to feed his family at a local Rite-Aid.  No I did not give him money, but he and my companion talked to him for more then a moment, not criticism, no "you should have done XYZ" & sent him on his way, no sucking the teeth, or "tsk, tsk, tsk, bad boy" self-righteousness.

For the record, I did not go alone to the residence  to bring food,which actually occurred 4 days after the initial meeting.

This man had just started a new job, just found a very humble place for him, his wife and teenage daughter. He struggled, as some men do, to not tear up.  I made sure I brought things that were complete & healthy, not cereal and no milk or peanut butter with no jelly. ( You get the idea).

I did it because it was the right thing to do.

Much to my surprise, I had a few people (I did not tell many) to actually criticize me for doing a humane thing.  The justifications ran the gamut of "you knows" as in  "how did you not know he was running a scam" to "there are places people like him could go", to "how you know know he wouldn't sell them for drugs"?

Well I didn't know, and it didn't matter.  Even a stray dog deserve a bone.

No one should ever ,ever be hungry no matter what we may think how he/she got there.  Even if he or she put themselves there.

What I am to do is to do my part; if he had messed up or blew it or whatever, if one is trying yet again, we help them up until they can stay up!  As that proverb goes "Fall down seven;Get up eight", we don't know if that 8 time will do the trick.

Or as the Apostle Luke stated at Luke17:3-4 "Pay attention to yourselves.  If your brother commits a sin give him a rebuke, & if he repents, forgive him. Even if he sins seven times a day against you & he comes back to you seven times saying "I repent", you must forgive him".

This man did nothing to me, I had not known that he existed until 5 days ago, but the principle is still clear.  I get the whole tough love approach that has been bullying people for over 2 decades now, but has it worked? Perhaps in a few cases, but not in most.  But folks love to use "tough love" to justify not exercising the privilege of being humane, to be compassionate.  And yet we wonder why things have gotten worse, a coarsening of society.

If a scam was ran, everytime that fork is lifted, he will be reminded that someone cared enough to help.  That just maybe, there will be a paradigm shift that 8th, 9th or 10th time will take.

I've been there, I know what it is like to not know if you will eat the next day, I know what it is like for someone who while maybe not in my presence ask the "what ifs/how do you know..." about me!  Yet there have been ones who have seen my humanity, of seeing I too, needed a second chance. at living, at contributing,as being part of the human race ...

Please note, I've never been a drug abusing, drinking, tobacco smoking anything, but you don't have to be to know hard times.  You do have to be in the wrong place at the right time for it to happen.

So did I go naively, blindly, foolishly, pell mell into being a do gooder? I doubt it, I was simply doing what was right and will continue to do that.

The rest will be up to them to carry on, but it is hard to carry on when one is hungry, in despair, cold, tired and troubled...

If that is not being grown up, then I don't want to ever grow up.  I simply want to do the right thing, at the right time for the right reason for the right person...

"Every thought you produce, anything you say, any action you do, it bears your signature."~Thich Nhat Hanh

So I hope my signature continues to be good and humane...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Moon, this is so true , all that you said, as i recall in the

good samaritan, of the Bible, he did not ask why he was on the side of the road, who he was , or for an id. He simply helped him.

I have had this discussion w/my pastor i fla. as so many people were coming to the church for a hand out that they began only after days , like you, giving them food, or medicine ,(paying for a needed rx) not pain meds etc at the time I felt that was too harsh, but truly i guess made sense . I wanted to just give them the needs at the moment they ask.


there will always be those that do not want to help anyone who is down are their luck. Perhaps those are the ones who feel "entitled" in another source of the meaning.