It sticks to you...

Fable of the porcupine

It was the coldest winter ever and many animals died because of the cold.

Some porcupines, realizing the gravity of the situation, decided to group together to share warmth.

This way they were better covered and protected; however - the quills of each one wounded their closest companions.

After a while they decided to distance themselves one from the other and soon after they began to die, alone and frozen.

So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth.

Wisely, they decided to go back to being together.

They learned to accept the little wounds that were caused by these close relationships, in order to benefit from what their companions offered.
It was this way that they were able to survive and thrive.

Moral of the story:

The best relationships are not ones that bring together perfect beings, but are instead ones where individuals learn to live with the imperfections of others and can still accept the gifts they have to offer.

Way to Geaux Ah ha Ha Ha~Emotional aerobics

I think humor does wonder for our well being, a form of emotional aerobics.

A friend sent this to me this morning that so tickle my funny bone:

"I urgently needed time off work, but I knew the Boss wouldn’t give it to me. So, I decided to act “crazy”, than he’d tell me to take a few days off. I hung by my knees from the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker, (not the smartest in the bunch) asked me what I was doing. I told her I was pretending to be a light bulb so the Boss would think I was crazy and give me a few days off. A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked “What do you think your doing?” I told him I was a light bulb. He said “Clearly you’re stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days.” I jumped down and walked out if the office. When my co-worker followed me, the Boss asked her, “Where do you think you’re going?” She said, “I going home too. I can’t work in the dark.”

NSA~ Need some Attention? It Only takes a Minute..

Some of my best thoughts comes to me immediately upon waking. Other times while I am walking or creating. This morning was one of those upon my awakening moments. I was reflecting on a conversation I had with two acquaintances about how despite a very mean spirited time we are living in, that human beings have not change a lot in the regard of needing kindness, good words or paying serious attention to. It is indeed in our nature to know that someone genuinely cares, that we get words of approval, or praise that is sincere. One of the remarks was that she was not the kind of person who needs "someone always patting her on the back or need to be the center of attention always". I gather what she was saying, but later that night I got to thinking"what about it when a person DOES need attention. What is wrong with that"? Is it a weakness or a false pride sense of autonomy/independence that makes people think they do not need it? Praise or genuine caring is to human beings what water & sun is to a growing plant. It is part of our makeup perhaps to different degrees,but still needed. Even while human beings are being constantly told to buck up, stop whining, act more like machines,be "professional" i.e non-feeling that we have truly arrived. If that is the case, why on why are suicides on the rise, more murders, more people on anti-depressant, obesity on the rise, etc if that was the case? All of us need a soft place to fall into. And the fear of an epidemic of drama queens & kings is what you have or the thought (egad) that if we give someone attention they will create more drama to get even more, I say AND? I would submit that if people GOT the attention, full dead on attention (which does not mean you have to fix the problem) that the craving for drama will actually subside not increase., Look at a moment at children, we all know if they cannot get your attention one way, they will up the ante until you turn around and then the outcome may not be the most beneficial to all. And paying attention may only take a few seconds but can make the recipient feel absolutely wonderful for the rest of the day. Yesterday in my walk I sent less then 3 minutes with a construction worker who was tending to a home be refurbished 5 years after Katrina. I could tell in those 3 minutes not only did he take pride in his work but he also cared about this city and his share in re-sparking this lovely place. My acknowledgement of that caring made him smile. I would like to say that I may never see him again, but that would not be true as the home is literally 1/2 block from where I live and I will make it a point a couple of times a week to walk in that direction to see the progress he is making. He knows (as I told him) I've been walking around looking at the homes where work has started, progressed & ended. So I know I will see him again. And with my acquaintances last night, I told him about that, I also talked about my experiences when someone gave ME attention and I passed it forward to someone else. I am quick o note when you can tell when a compliment is not sincere or a person is being patronizing. That is not the kind of attention I desire or need. But I do enjoyed looking for ways to give attention to someone else, friend or stranger alike. You never know how or what your attention to that person can make all the difference in the world to them. And as a side advantage, YOU may end of benefiting from the residual well being of the recipient. Our world today is filled with meanness, criticism, outright slander & belittling others. We as a culture rewards this kind of bad behavior. We pay people huge sums of money, making "celebrities" out of them giving them platforms to extol cruelty, be "entertained by bad behavior. (Kinda reminds me of what the whole Roman Empire/Christians being murdered in the arena, gluttony, debasement for entertainment mindset). No I do not think we have to go to the Pleasantville/Leave it to Beaver extreme either as that is all fantasy any how, but we truly see a rapidly eroding civility going on, much which is fueled by the media,& the Internet. We now have a couple of generations of people who have difficulty connecting with people in IRL, somehow taking solace or even yes I said it) pride in their "ability" not to "need" anyone of looking at disconnection as a badge of honor,source of pride... So when we tsk tsk tsk, or bemoan still yet another murder/suicide or wonder where the world is going or think that we have lost our natural mind, for a moment, please, think back of when was the last time YOU gave attention to someone for even just a few seconds, which could have made all the difference in the world.

Be a Character!

Suffering is the tuition one pays for a character degree.

- Richard M. Rayner, M.D.


What you Learn from Suffering
"Perhaps you think this isn't very positive' sounding, but I find it helps people (patients and friends) put hardship, which is inevitable, to good use," says Richard. "People can use their suffering either to gain character or become bitter. The ones who choose bitterness live a long, slow death. The ones who choose character truly live." Richard is right on the money. Happiness and sadness don't happen to us--they come from within. The story of your life will be written with or without your help. The next chapter is happening while you read this. Will you wait to see what it says later, or will you help write it?

, SparkPeople member What you really learn from hardships "Perhaps you think this isn't very positive' sounding, but I find it helps people (patients and friends) put hardship, which is inevitable, to good use," says Richard. "People can use theirsuffering either to gain character or become bitter. The ones who choose bitterness live a long, slow death. The ones who choose character truly live." Richard is right on the money. Happiness and sadness don't happen to us--they come from within. The story of your life will be written with or without your help. The next chapter is happening while you read this. Will you wait to see what it says later, or will you help write it?

A Man Named Pearl Coming to New Orleans!

If you are in the New Orleans area, you must come & see this extraordinary man speak. Otherwise search out the documentary "A Man Named Pearl". It is the most warming,restorative story of the human spirit & artistry.

He will appear on CBS affiliate WWL-4 Thursday morning

SELF-TAUGHT TOPIARY ARTIST PEARL FRYAR
Fryar to Speak on a Panel with Leah Chase and Edward "Kidd" Jordan

When Pearl Fryar and his wife sought to buy a house in an all-white neighborhood of Bishopville, SC, they were discouraged with the explanation that "Black people don't keep up their yards."

Remarkably, instead of fueling bitterness and anger, this comment motivated Pearl to win the Bishopville "Yard of the Month Award," and eventually to transform his ordinary suburban yard into a horticultural wonderland.

The garden's topiary centerpiece emblazons both its message and Pearl's own philosophy: "Love, Peace, and Goodwill."

Schedule:

What: "An Evening with Pearl Fryar"
When: 5:30p Thursday Oct 14th
Where: Longue Vue's Playhouse
Cost: $10 Suggested Donation

On Friday October 15th

What: A Man Named Pearl Screening

When: 9am, Friday, Oct 15th
Where: Dilliard University Lawless Chapel
Cost: Free


Topiary Sculpture Demonstration by Pearl Fryar
10:15am

Dilliard Lawless Chapel
Free to Public; 1st come 1st served

Panel Discussion with Pearl Fryar, Leah Chase & Edward "Kidd" Jordan
For more information, contact Hilaririe Schackai at 504 488 5488,ext 401 or hschackai@longuevue.com